How do I get a sense of whether we are a good fit?

Book a free 20-minute meet-and-greet. There are no forms to perfect and no commitment. You can ask questions and get a sense of how it feels to speak with me. Therapeutic fit matters, and you are allowed to explore different options before deciding.

Therapist in Toronto for Neurodivergent Adults

Q: What does having a neurodivergent therapist actually change about therapy?

You may spend less time explaining and more time feeling understood. You will not need to justify why eye contact is draining, why just using a planner has not worked, or why a late diagnosis can bring grief alongside relief. My lived experience does not replace clinical training. It means the two work together.

Q: What are sessions with you like as a neurodivergent client?

Sessions are flexible by design. Stimming is welcome. You can turn your camera off, take breaks, use the chat instead of speaking, or bring notes. Sessions are 50 minutes, virtual, and paced with attention to your nervous system rather than forcing you through a rigid agenda.

Q: What if therapy has not worked for me before?

That is a common experience, and it does not necessarily mean you failed at therapy. Approaches built around neurotypical expectations can leave neurodivergent clients feeling corrected rather than understood. We begin by looking at what did not work before and identifying how therapy can be adapted differently.

Michael Holker, Registered Social Worker and neurodiversity-affirming therapist, Ontario

I know what it’s like to carry the weight of misunderstanding.

I'm Michael Holker, MSW, RSW — a neurodivergent therapist and the founder of Becoming Yourself Counselling and Consulting. I built this practice around a simple belief: neurodivergent adults deserve therapy that works with their brains, not against them. I know both sides of the therapy room: the relief of finally being understood, and the cost of years spent masking just to get by.

Becoming Yourself exists so that ADHD, autistic, AuDHD, and gifted (2e) adults across Ontario have a place where they don't have to translate themselves to be supported.

For many years, I lived under misdiagnoses and masked my differences to fit expectations. Like many of my clients, I felt the pressure to strive harder, to meet standards that left me drained, and to pretend everything was fine even when it wasn’t. That disconnect—between who I truly was and who I thought I had to be—was exhausting.

Discovering my own neurodivergence later in life was a turning point. It was not a quick or easy process. It brought grief for the years I spent misunderstanding myself, but also relief in finally having language for my experience. It permitted me to step away from the “shoulds” that had defined so much of my life and to begin cultivating a more authentic way of being.

That journey shapes not only how I live, but also how I practice therapy, and remains central to my journey toward becoming yourself, a process of unlearning, self-acceptance, and becoming more fully who we are.

“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.”
- Carl Gustav Jung

Book a Free 20-Minute Meet-and-Greet

A Blend of Personal & Professional Experience

As a neurodiversity-affirming therapist and Registered Social Worker (RSW), I’ve spent 15+ years in mental health, supporting neurodivergent adults. I discovered my own neurodivergence later in life, which helps me recognize the realities many clients face—masking, sensory overwhelm, chronic invalidation, difficult transitions—and how isolating it can feel when those experiences are dismissed.

Much of this work includes offering neuroaffirming therapy for adults in Ontario, particularly for individuals navigating executive functioning challenges, burnout, late diagnosis, and long-standing self-criticism.

Therapy here is not about erasing difference; it’s a collaborative space to understand yourself more deeply, practice workable strategies, and cultivate compassion for parts of you that worked hard to get through an often-demanding world.

This perspective also shapes how I provide therapy for Autistic adults, ADHD therapy for adults, therapy for AuDHD adults, and therapy for gifted 2e adults, with care centred on identity development, masking fatigue, nervous system regulation, and creating space for authentic self-expression.

Education, Registration & Training

I hold an Honours Bachelor of Arts from the University of Toronto, a Bachelor of Social Work from Dalhousie University, and a Master of Social Work from the University of Windsor. I'm a Registered Social Worker in good standing with the Ontario College of Social Workers and Social Service Workers (Registration #826405).

My training includes Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT), Motivational Interviewing (MI), and IFS- and polyvagal-informed practices. Professional training gives me tools; lived experience deepens my empathy. Both shape how I listen, pace sessions, and collaborate.

My work is relational, client-centred, trauma-informed, strengths-based, humanistic, and existential.

HBA

University of Toronto

BSW

Dalhousie University

MSW

University of Windsor

Registered Social Worker (RSW)

Ontario College of Social Workers
and Social Service Workers
(OCSWSSW)

Core Values in Therapy

Understanding: Time and space to be heard without expectation or criticism.

Compassion: A kinder stance toward yourself, grounded in curiosity rather than harshness.

Acceptance: Working with what’s present—identity, history, current realities— so change is realistic and sustainable.

Non-judgmental: A safe, steady place to reflect at your own pace.

How We’ll Work Together

Collaborative & Paced

We choose focus areas together and move at a tolerable rhythm.

Practical When Helpful

Tools for executive function, emotion regulation, and communication, adapted to fit you.

Virtual Across Ontario

Secure online counselling in Ontario makes therapy more accessible wherever you live.

FAQ - Questions People Ask Me

How do I start working with you?

The first step is a free 20-minute meet-and-greet, where we can talk about what brings you in and see whether working together feels right. If it's a fit, we'll book your first session from there — and if my availability is limited, I'll always tell you honestly and help you figure out next steps.

What does having a neurodivergent therapist actually change about therapy?

You spend less time explaining and more time being understood. You won't need to justify why eye contact is draining, why "just use a planner" hasn't worked, or why a late diagnosis brings grief along with relief. My lived experience doesn't replace clinical training — it means the two work together.

Do I need a formal diagnosis to work with you?

No. Many of my clients are self-identifying, questioning, or on an assessment waitlist. Your experience is enough of a reason to be here — we work with what you're living, not what a document says.

What are sessions with you like as a neurodivergent client?

Flexible by design. Stimming is welcome. You can turn your camera off, take breaks, use the chat instead of speaking, or bring notes. Sessions are 50 minutes, virtual, and paced to your nervous system — not to an agenda.

What if therapy hasn't worked for me before?

That's a common story here, and it usually wasn't your fault. Therapy built for neurotypical patterns can leave neurodivergent clients feeling corrected instead of understood. We start by figuring out what didn't work before, and we do it differently.

Michael Holker, RSW

Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist in Ontario